Freedom To Be

Do you know that you control your future? You are in control of being rich or poor, happy or sad, prosperous or lacking; everything! You are in control. So if you don't like where you are right now, you have the power to change it! How cool is that?

You are in control of who you are! Everything is a choice. Do you choose to be an alcoholic or drug addict? Then that's who you are. Is it your choice to live on the street? Do you choose to allow the naysayers of the economy to tell you how bad your life is? It's no one else's life you're living. It's not a disease that you need medication for or counseling. It's your choice! If you don't want to be that person anymore, you can change your actions and be what you want.

Is it easy? No. But it is YOUR choice and YOUR choice alone. No amount of blaming or feeling sorry for yourself will change you. In fact all that does is make matters worse. You are not a victim of circumstances. You are the creator of your circumstances. The real joy of that, however, is that since you created where you are right now, you can create something different. It just takes a decision to think different thoughts. And each time a negative thought shows it's scaly little head, you combat it with a positive thought!

For example: I don't have any money, becomes, I have all the money I need at this time. And it's really a true statement, isn't it? You have a home, food, utilities. You may not have all the things you WANT, but you do have all that you NEED right now.

"So, I want more money". Then create it! How? Change your thoughts from the lack of money to what it would feel like to be abundant. How does it make you feel? What would you do with it? Visualize yourself having more and feel how good that feels. Make peace with where you are right now; in fact be grateful for what you have right now and as you tune yourself into those grateful thoughts, you will attract more grateful thoughts to you. Then, the better you feel, and the happier you get. Good things HAVE to come your way, because now, you are creating the circumstances that welcome them instead of making excuses for why they are not there.

Be the Powerful Creator you came here to be! Re-connect with that part of YOU that is continuously connected to Source energy (God, Light, whatever you want to call it). You are a magnificent being in physical form. Don't let the physical form stand in your way. Allow your power to change your life into whatever you wish.

How will you change your life today?

Re-Connecting To Who I AM

Yesterday, Sarah left on her life's adventure. I was happy to have had the time I had with her, but of course being a Mom, wished it could have been longer. It was a very emotional good-bye for me. But I know she has a wonderful future ahead of her and she will follow her wisdom to experience all she came to this time and space to enjoy. She goes with my love and blessings.

Now that she is gone, I decided to take a little time off to re-connect myself to who I really am. It was very difficult to write while she was here, but now that she's gone, I can once again concentrate on all the wonderful life around me. It's time to re-group and focus my attention fully on what brings me joy, and know that she is in capable hands, those of her higher self!

What better way to re-connect than to have a "rampage of appreciation", as Abraham-Hicks says. So here goes:

I am grateful for living in the Bay area right now because the temperature is a wonderful cool 68-75 degrees. Not the 100+ my friends in Portland and Vancouver are enjoying right now. I'm grateful for my loving husband, who supports me and encourages each and every day of my life. He doesn't even have to say anything! I can just be sitting next to him and through osmosis be encouraged and feel total unconditional love. Now, that's POWERFUL!

As I sit here writing, I can think of hundreds of things to be grateful for. Here's what I do. As I focus my attention on one grateful thought, another wonderful, grateful thought joins that one, and then another joins that, and so on. Throughout the day, when my mind wanders to sadness or thoughts that make me depressed, I consciously choose to re-focus my thoughts to something I appreciate. As I do, it becomes easier and easier to keep focused only on those thoughts that make me happy. At the end of the day, I'm in a much better place than when I started. Hallelulah! My goal has been accomplished!

Each day is a brand new day, full of grand experiences for me to be grateful for. So here I go, finding my Forever Joy Again!

Have you been through a particularly hard time and find yourself trying to re-connect to your joy? What are some of the ways you've chosen to get back to your true self? I would love to hear your stories.

Trapped Between Two Worlds

Sometimes I feel trapped in two worlds, the mommy world and the spiritual world. Sometimes it's hard to remember all is well, when I'm in "mommy mode".

I wrote the above statement on Facebook. I've been asking myself why I feel that way. I asked Wisdom to help me know the answer to that question and please answer it so I can get passed it. Here's what Wisdom revealed to me.

Mommy mode is all about unreleased beliefs and old recordings from childhood! We are taught that moms are suppose to be a certain way and do certain things. According to society, if we do not perform in the acceptable prescribed mommy way, we are not good moms. And what do I want to be? A good mom, of course.

This was pretty much brought home to me during a conversation I had with a friend. I told her as I talked to my daughter, I happened to share too much of my opinion with her. My friend's response was typical of the belief that society has in these matters. She told me, it really is my responsibility to share my opinion with my daughter so she could weigh that in when she is making her decisions in life. Now, this all sounds really great, but my opinions do not necessarily speak to what she needs to complete her adventures on this plane. In fact, they could (in the extreme sense), cause her to repeat some same scenarios to finally do what her Inner Wisdom is guiding her to do. Is that what I want for my daughter? Absolutely not!

Now, each time I deal with a subject related to Sarah, and I feel a lump in my stomach or throat, I ask Wisdom what old belief system or recording I'm struggling with. As soon as I get the answer, I can release it. Some things are easier to release than others, but if I truly want to move forward, I seek a better feeling thought; even if it's a little one. Then that thought attracts more good thoughts and more, and more, until finally, I'm able to let go entirely of that belief or recording that does not serve me any longer.

By the way, this works for other relationships as well, ie, parents; friends; siblings; etc.

Tell me your success story of releasing beliefs or recordings. I'd love to share your victories with you!

Letting Go

I love my daughter being home. It's wonderful to be with her again. Shopping, talking, or just watching a movie together feels SO special. We have had a great time together since she's been here.

Along with the good times, I've had to face some of my challenges once again. It's called "letting go".

Sarah is 22 years old and in the Army. She has her own life now and some of the decisions she makes are not ones I would make. Then I have to remember that just like me, she is an eternal light being in a physical body, and has come to this lifetime for adventure just as I have.

It's only natural for me, as a mom, to want to step in and "warn" my daughter of what I believe to be impending danger (not that it really is). But I firmly believe we are more than "natural", we are "super-natural". We are creators of our own lives. Even, my little Sarah is the creator of her own life. Will she make the right decisions? I KNOW she will! Those decisions may not be what I would choose, but they will be the perfect ones for her. Perhaps the things I thought were disastrous for her, are the very things she came to this existence to experience. So if I try and stop her, I will be robbing her of the very excitement she sought. It all goes back to knowing we are ALL eternal creators. Not just the grown ups, but our children as well.

So I rejoice that Sarah chose me to be her mom. I'm grateful for any time we can spend together, and I encourage her to be the wonderful God she really is. I release her into the very capable hands of her glorious Higher Self, or what I call, her Wisdom. All is well!

My Dilemma

Ya know when you're feeling kinda down, unhappy, or sad how you just want to close yourself off from the rest of the world? You just don't really want to talk to anyone because you don't want to spread your negative attitude to them? Well, that's where I am right now.

And I know I sound like a broken record, but ya know what I KNOW right this very instant? It's my choice to be in this place. I can shut myself off and get all inside myself and feel bad, or I can get on this blog page and tell you all what I'm going through. Not in the "poor me" kinda way, but in the, "now it's time for me to walk my talk" kinda way.

So this is how I change directions. I know that the reason I'm feeling bad is because somewhere along the line, I'm resisting well-being. In my case, most likely, it's because I allow someone else's actions to decide my happiness and because I have a preset way of thinking how things should turn out, when they don't I get upset. Now, is that the other party's fault because they do not live up to MY expectations? Of course not! It's my challenge, because I'm the one with the expectations to begin with. Expectations come out of judgment. I judge another person's actions to be right or wrong, good or bad, and therefore allow it to affect my joy.

Wow, even just admitting that and writing it down for you all, has helped me change the direction I was headed in. Will I choose joy, and walk my own path without judging what others "should do", or will I give in to the solitary confinement I impose on myself because I choose to wallow in the mire?

Anyone else ever experience this dilemma? What did you choose?

Fear

I've been hearing a lot about fear lately. It's in the news, it's on the radio; it's even gotten to be a subject of discussion on Facebook and Twitter! But what is fear, really?

For me, Jacquelyn Aldana, author of The 15-Minute Miracle described fear in the perfect way.
Fear is: Forgetting Everything's All Right!

If I look at the things I'm afraid of, I can sum it up quite well. Anything that I'm not in control of, I put the label "fear" on. For example: If my husband is driving and we are on a windy, very skinny mountain road with a bare drop outside my window and a truck comes along from the other direction and Mark inches over to the cliff side just a fraction to make room for the big rig; I'm clawing the dashboard, crying and yelling, terrified we will drop to our deaths. But if we were in the same scenario, but I was driving, I would be just fine!

So, now what I do is stop and think, "okay, so we drop to our deaths. We leave this physical realm side by side and enter into the glorious non-physical where we re-unite with that part of ourselves that is joined to true Source energy and pure love. We re-evaluate what we did in this lifetime, and decide what we want to do next, then re-enter this realm or another realm (as we wish), for more adventures! What's so bad about that?"

So what else am I afraid of? "The Unknown". Sounds like a movie title. But as I think about it, I see, the unknown is just more of the same. I'm not in control. "The Unknown" is in control.

I'm one of those people that likes to plan everything. I want to know ahead of time what's going to be going on, where we are going, and for how long, so I can plan everything out. It's so I can be in control. So, for me, I guess fear is a control issue.

What is fear to you? Break it down. Is it really fear? Or as Jacquelyn says, are you "FORGETTING EVERYTHING'S ALL RIGHT"?

"A Haunting"

Today, my daughter, Sarah, and her boyfriend, Billy were going through our collection of DVD movies and TV series and came upon, "A Haunting". Mark and I got this series a long time ago when we started on our Metaphysical path. At one time, we did a lot of visiting cemeteries and haunted places to see if we could help lost spirits find their way into the light. We very much believed in demons and devils from our previous church upbringing, but knew we also had the power to come up against anything evil. We knew we had the light in us and that would dispel any darkness there was.

Well, we've grown in our spirituality and have let go of many of our old belief systems, and in the process have discovered the awesome power of our minds. We discovered the only evil there is in this world is within our own imagination, and for some reason, it used to be an incredible turn on to scare ourselves.

No more! Now we understand there are no demons or devils except those in our minds and we have taken on the challenge to rid ourselves of all those thoughts and belief systems.

As I watched the program with Sarah and Billy, it was actually humorous to me as I remembered how I, too believed as these poor people in the series believed. I knew their fear and found myself wanting to jump through the screen and say, "You guys, don't you know if you want to believe in evil, evil will exist. If you do not give it power, it cannot survive!"

Now, as I write this, I know this is true in other areas of my life as well, because whatever I put my attention on, I will draw to myself. So if I fear demons or devils, that is what I will conjure up in my mind. If I have any fear, it will control my actions so I cannot live in total freedom. If I wake up in the morning and trip on my slipper, walk into the wall and burn my fingers on the toast, then say to myself, "it's gonna be one of those days", then it will be!

Fortunately I can also attract happiness and wonderful surprises to me as well. It's funny that when that happens we say it's just a coincidence, when in reality, because of what I'm putting my attention on, more good stuff comes my way.

So will you be afraid of the demons and devils created by Hollywood to bring more fear to your heart? Or will you choose to put your attention on what your heart truly desires? I choose light!

Shout Box

Oh my goodness! I am soooo good at this. I've set up a "shout box" for anyone who wants to make a comment or add their "two cents " to my blog. I'm excited, because, first, I hope this will be easier for you to make comments and I really want to hear from you all more often, and two because I figured it out all by myself! Yep! That's right! All by my little lonesome! I'm so proud!

Now, you have even more choices to respond to my blog. You can put a comment in the "shout box"; make a comment under the comment section; or email me.

You know what this means? I'm going to post some pretty controversial stuff sometimes. I will do this on purpose to see what you all are thinking about out there.

Thank you ahead of time for the comments and for reading this blog! It blesses my heart to have an outlet for my thoughts, and it enables me to keep in touch with what others think. So comment away! Love to you all!

Minding My Own Business

I've decided that today, Sunday, is a great day to set my intentions for the week. Each and everyday, I can re-affirm those intentions, but because Sunday is the beginning, for me it's the right time to decide what I want to focus on all week long.

My intention is to find ways each and every day to mind my own business. Every person in this realm has come here to experience life. How they do that is none of my business. Some have chosen to be happy creators, others, whiners. Some choose to live in mansions with loads of possessions and money, but a very sad heart, when others choose to be surrounded by family and have very little, yet are happy and joyous. That's not to say there are those who are rich and happy at the same time, and others that are poor and sad, my point is, it is none of my business how others have chosen to live. It's my business to live MY life.

My opinion is of no value for anyone else. It's just like the saying goes; opinions are like assholes; everyone has one and thinks everyone else's stink.

For me, this decision is very difficult, especially when it comes to my children. No parent wants to see their child walking into what we determine to be a minefield, but is it really? When I see my daughters doing something I think is detrimental to their health and well-being, am I not judging their life by my beliefs? If I see them going down the same path I went down when I was young, what makes me think the outcome has to be the same? Perhaps they will make different decisions and come out in a better place than me. How wonderful would that be.

Instead of judging their route in life with a negative eye. My intention is to stay out of their business and give them the benefit of my love and encouragement no matter what my old beliefs try to dictate. I wonder how many times my children have made decisions that landed them in sorrow because from a heart wanting to protect them I've concentrated my thoughts and theirs on a negative outcome.

Oh, Wisdom, let today be the beginning of encouraging my children along their way, even if my belief is different. Guide me in minding my own business.

Trip To San Francisco

San Francisco was not as cold as we thought it would be. In fact it was down right nice! I would even go so far as to say, beautiful. Even though Sarah and Billy could not go to Alcatraz today, as planned, we all still had a marvelous time walking all around the bay. Sarah got to have her clam chowder bread bowl and shopped until she almost literally dropped!

I have been so excited about Sarah coming to visit for such a long time that now that she is here, I realize not only how much I've missed her, but, how much I have not let her go! I still want to have my little girl. I know she's all grown up. Hell, she's even been in Kuwait serving in the Army, but somehow, I still have it in my head that our relationship is the same as it was before she left. It's difficult for me to realize that just as I have gone on with my life and a lot has changed for me; she has gone on with her life as well and much as changed for her too.

Our relationship will never be the same again. That is not to say that it is bad! It's wonderful. It's just different.

For the first few days that Sarah has been home, (including today), I've tried to re-gain what we had in the past and been very disappointed and upset. But as we were getting ready to go to San Francisco this morning, I found myself tied up in knots! I was unreasonably short with Mark, and felt I had to force a smile. As the day progressed, I saw what was happening. My little Sarah was an adult now and was on her own path, which just put me in a different role than I've been in before.

I'm grateful for my loving husband putting up with my sharp and unreasonable attitude and loving me anyway, and I'm grateful for Wisdom helping me see what the problem is. Now all I have to do is release it and allow it to be transformed into something magnificent. In other words, practice what I preach! Even in this, I must choose a better feeling thought! I must choose to allow her to live her life. I must choose joy in each and every situation. So let the choosing begin!

Icicle Sarah

The day Sarah and Billy left Kuwait, the temperature was 130 degrees! Now, in this wonderful cool 70 degree weather we are experiencing, she is freezing!









Tomorrow, we are planning a trip into San Francisco. Billy has never been there before and wants to see what it's all about. They are going to go to Alcatraz, in the middle of San Francisco Bay. I told Sarah, she better take my parka. She's gonna need it for the ferry ride!

The Shopping Trip

Shopping! That's what Sarah had her heart set on today. So after a nice breakfast, off we went to Walnut Creek. I love that little town; filled with unique boutiques and big chain stores like Nordstrom's and Macy's. It's an outdoor mall setting with lots of benches and flowers all over the place and wonderful fountains and eateries with outdoor seating. Perfect for a relaxed shopping trip!



To the left is Sarah with her boyfriend, Billy. Awww, young love!

After walking all over town, (and I do mean ALL over town), we went to lunch at a wonderful little Chinese place named, PF Chang's China Bistro. Anyone heard of it? To the right is Sarah after a delightful and satisfying meal.

It was truly a wonderful day spent with Sarah remembering days gone by and getting to know Billy. Thank you both for making my day super special.

Also, when I got home, I got a call from a friend in Portland. That in itself was a welcome surpirse, but even more so was the fact that by him simply calling and sharing his life, Wisdom was able to remind me of what my own focus should be. Happiness and joy! That is the most important thing I can achieve in this lifetime. Each and every moment is magnificent and special, so it's my desire to squeeze out every ounce of joy I can!

Oh my goodness.....I'm really looking forward to the next moment! And now the next...and the next! What joyous surprises await?

A Day At The Fair

Today, was our first day with Sarah and her boyfriend, Billy. So knowing how much Sarah would enjoy it, we went to the Alameda County Fair. Sarah and Billy made a beeline for the rides, and Mark and I just wandered around. We saw a professional Roller Derby demonstration, and decided to go to the "Skynnyn Lynnyrd", concert. (They are a tribute band to the Lyn.yrd Skynyrd band).

We had a great time. I'm look forward to doing more cool things with Sarah and Billy, and will post a whole bunch of pictures, because that's what Mom's do best.

For now, to the right is Sarah and Billy getting ready to go on a ride through a "horror house".

The next three pictures are of the band. And by the way; they were good! Really, really good!

Sending Light and Love

Today is the day! Sarah comes home tonight! I'm so excited! But along with my excitement, there is a little apprehension too. We haven't seen each other in two and a half years, and I'm in a totally different place than I was the last time I saw her, so I'm really nervous. Will she want to be around me? We live in such a small space, will she want to leave sooner because it is so crowded?

Some of my questions are coming up from my own place of insecurity and I'm countering them with the story I want to tell, instead of the one based in my fears.

So, as I've gone through today, there have been times when actual panic cropped up and my first reaction is to post something on Facebook or Twitter to request light and loving energy for this situation. And just in the middle of writing my plea, Wisdom shined the true light on my thoughts and actions.

What do I really want from my friends? Prayers? Light? Loving Energy? That all sounds so very spiritual and angelic, but the truth is, I want to share my anguish with someone. I want to pour out my heart and have a companion or friend listen. What would I do with their light, prayers, or energy? I have my own. In fact, I AM the Light, and no one knows what I need right now more than me! It occurs to me that when people send their prayers, or light to me, it is their light, filled with their objectives and opinions. Solutions to challenges that have worked for them in the past, but they are not, perhaps, what I need. So if I truly want to be guided, I will ask only the one who knows me best. . . my Wisdom. And if I want to just have an ear to listen, or a companion to cry with, then I can post my plight on Facebook and Twitter. But to do that, I must realize, I am opening myself up to their opinions and energy. Now, is that really helpful for me?

So, this is my conclusion: I will not send light, or loving energy, or prayers, because we all have full access to those energies within each one of us, if we will only seek it. But, awww, let me be the ear that someone else may need; be the arms they crave wrapped around their hearts, and the gentle guidance back to their own Wisdom for the answers they seek.

The Ugliness Within

How few there are who have courage enough to own their faults, or resolution enough to mend them- Benjamin Franklin.


My desire to live my life in the most joyous state possible, has caused me to closely examine my attitudes, beliefs, and emotions. In turn, I've had to see the ugliness of some of those tightly held beliefs and decide if they are still serving me, or if it's time to open my heart and let them be transmuted in the light to be replaced with peace and love. So, why wouldn't I want to give up ugliness in my life? The simple answer to that is because those thoughts and beliefs that now seem so horrible and off to me have been part of my life for a very very long time and letting go of them seems like I'm letting go of a piece of my existence.

For example: if someone does not act the way I think they should act, I have a problem. If someone disrupts my peace and solitude, I have a problem. Now, I understand it truly is my problem, not theirs! I am the one allowing them to disrupt me. And who am I to think I should dictate to anyone else how they should live or what they should do or should not do to bring joy into their own lives? They are simply going about their business to experience life in their own way. Anyone else ever feel like that?

I'm ready! Now my intention is to face all those old beliefs, and dogmatic attitudes in my life so I can move forward with joy.

Some of those nasty habits are easy to release; others not so much. But oh, the freedom my spirit experiences when I finally open my hand. It is worth the little bit of pain that may accompany facing the truth. It's like all the angels are singing with me; Light floods my soul, and any thought of non forgiveness toward myself flee!

So, do you have ugly attitudes or dogmatic beliefs that keep you from experiencing all that you came to experience in this life? Come, let us release those anchors together, and soar hand in hand through eternity.

Shopping with my niece

My goodness, is it the 4th of July all ready? Wow. This year seems to be flying by.

Today, I had a wonderful day with my niece! We shopped together; we ate together; we shared our lives with each other. Thank you Debbie! You are the greatest!

Pet Peeves

I was going to write a blog on "pet peeves" today, but a funny thing happened on the way to publish my article...Wisdom spoke.

I never realized what I was doing before, but now that I know, I can change it to reflect a higher vibrational stance. Here's what Wisdom said:

"Why do you call those things you get upset about 'pets'? Isn't a pet a being that you love? Don't you have pets roaming about your home and you have deep affection for them? So much affection that when one passes out of this reality, you grieve?

'And isn't it so that sometimes you refer to your lover as a 'pet'? Or some activity that you greatly enjoy you call your 'pet project'?

'Then why would you want to have affection for that which brings dis-harmony to your life? Why do you love the dis-harmony enough to refer to it as your 'pet peeve'? Is not that like saying, 'this thing that brings me great distress really bothers me and gets under my skin, but I really love it! Even though it ties my stomach in knots and turns my attention to more of that which I don't want; I still love it dearly. I can give up all kinds of other short-comings in my life, but this 'peeve', has to stay because I love it so much.

'Dear one, do you see how ridiculous that sounds? Do you still want to hold it close to your heart now?"

So I went to my trusty dictionary and here are some of the definitions of "pet".

1. An animal kept for amusement or companionship.
2. An object of the affections.
3. A person especially loved or indulged; a favorite: the teacher's pet.

ADJECTIVE:

1. Kept as a pet: a pet cat.
2. 1. Particularly cherished or indulged: a pet grandchild.
   2. Expressing or showing affection: a pet name.
3. Being a favorite: a pet topic.

Now I realize, I don't want to have any "pet peeves". For me, all that comes of it is a waste of energy and resistance to well-being! Thank you Wisdom!

Welcome Home, Sarah!

Sarah, my baby girl, is coming home! I'm so excited. It's been about 2 1/2 years since I saw her!

Sarah chose to join the Army and was stationed in Germany. While there, she was deployed to Kuwait for a year. Now she's coming home, just for leave; but we get to spend almost three glorious weeks with her. There is so much I want to share; so many places I want to show her; I know three weeks will fly by in the blink of an eye. I'm gonna enjoy every second I can.







Top: Sarah at 2 yrs. old. Right: With her Army face on. Center: The playful girl I now know! I'll probably have to publish more pics of her later. Because that's just what a proud Mama does!